Scallywag

Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.

~ Anthony Burgess ~

Why You’re Going Mad

February 9th, 2014 ~ Est. reading time: 2 mins, 31 secs

"Irritated pigs can now fly"

“Thanks to new breakthrough irritated pigs can fly”

Thanks to Internet advertising, did you know “You Can Get A Flatter Stomach In 30 Seconds”? While you are at it, you can also “Discover What Your Sleeping Positions Say About You”. Which may explain why sometimes you feel like you are going mad.

Yes, mad, mad, MAD! You innocently find a potential website of interest, only to see it is peppered with the most inane and exploitative promotions.

Consider, “Man Hands! Jerry Seinfeld’s 10 Best Breakup Excuses”. Or, the remarkable “Orgasm Almanac: 10 Surprising Ways to Rock Her World”.

Surely, this stuff is 100% pure schlock, intended to suck us into clicking through in case there might be the tiniest smidgeon of truth worth finding out about. Unfortunately, or should I say annoyingly, there isn’t the vaguest suggestion of anything remotely useful in this stuff.

You can forget about “How Doctors Lose Weight”, and the headline, “American Mom Reveals FREE Facelift Secret”. It’s utter rubbish that deliberately wastes your time and has only one agenda. Yep, you guessed correctly. It’s all aimed at separating you from your income.

Take it as read that titles like ”You’re Overpaying For Your Health Insurance” and “The Biggest Mistake You’re Making When It Comes To Eating” aren’t even worth reading, let alone clicking. If they were honest, they’d say something like, “Deliberately Trying to Exploit You”, “Scammy People Put Up Yet Another Teasing Ad”, and “We Secretly Believe You’re Gullible”.

So laugh about the headline trumpeting, “The Top 20 Hottest Celebrity Women With Freckles”, “10 Things You Should Never Say To A Person Of Mixed Race” and “The One Crazy Food That Will Make You Forever Slim”. Get mad if you will. But don’t be bothered for long, as this sort of snake oil sales approach has been around for a long time.

Should you be cynical about what you read on the Internet? Maybe. But you certainly don’t have to be. Better to apply your questioning mind and a dash of reason. Ask yourself the question, “If this claim is valid, why aren’t credible experts in the field making this widely known across all media?“Is this suggestion plausible? And do the other promotions touted round it seem genuine as well?

This drivel that masquerades as news, usable advice, or new, hot breakthrough is undermining the quality of main articles, journalism, and real news. For the sake of advertising revenue, many sites pitch anything at you and couldn’t care less about matters of sincerity or credibility.

Personally, I recommend you sidestep any site that treats you like an imbecile. Click away from places that pose even the slightest whiff of scamming ads. That way, your actions will teach these people that disrespecting your intelligence doesn’t cut it. Alternatively, post a comment and tell them directly if you like. For my part, I’ve resisted ads on happy.fm so far because of these issues. Not that I’m against advertising. Just that it needs to be relevant and respect the reader.

As irritating as “This One Simple Rule To Achieving A Six Pack” is, at least you can now “Monetize Your Site” while smugly knowing that “Power Companies Hate This”. Should you bother to find out what these are all about? Nah! Don’t even think about it because it only wastes your time, which is irritating. Even if you feel you really could use the “The New Testosterone Booster To Hit The Shelves”, hang up your hat, go outside and do something useful. Because life is way too precious to waste on greasy people selling slippery snake oil.

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