What I know for sure is that you feel real JOY in direct proportion to how connected you are to living your truth.

~ Oprah Winfrey ~

The Trouble With Greedy Grubby Pushy Selling

June 13th, 2012 ~ Est. reading time: 2 mins, 5 secs

Pushy selling wears you down.

“Why do they do it?” Such a huge amount of human communication is turning into a dirty gruel of drivel that is devaluing our humanity. The rude, tactless business of pedaling pushy selling has humankind in a vice-like grip; desperately bludgeoning us into submission.

“Lose hundreds of pounds in the hour? Ask me how?” “Diets don’t work. So here’s another.” “It’s a fact that you are totally to blame for your skin.”  “Only the best people have shiny, lustrous hair.” “Want to be rich and successful/have the perfect teeth/eyes/car/vacation/house/whatever?” “Do you picture success beyond your wildest dreams together with the man of your dreams while you’re dreaming on the world’s best bed?” “My skin specialists wanted to lock me up. But I can show you which lemons are best to suck to create that tight-faced youthful look.” Pushy selling is rampant.

So far into the 21st Century, pushy selling continues unabated. Filling our email inboxes and testing our twitter reserve, it’s drowning out real conversation. These people are doing the equivalent of seizing the town hall microphone and shout-selling hype at the crowd. They treat people as poorly as they see them, believing that sheer will rather than skill will make anyone buy anything. Maybe we will… if only to shut them up.

Still, you deserve so much better. Nobody should abuse your dignity by forcing their pushy selling spiel onto you. The online community is enduring a damaging attack because so much talk isn’t talking at all. If two people are in a room and one communicates, but the latter pile-drives the moment with ugly selling, what’s left? The moment is irretrievably damaged. Aussies call this “flogging” as in “flogging a dead horse.” It’s degrading, pointless, and obnoxious. But, clearly, these people are playing a numbers game. Trawl through enough of us and, presumably, someone will succumb and buy their rubbish. This is where we need to see things for what they are.

Now I don’t mean sharing ideas with an agenda to sell is pushy selling. A lot of selling is actually helpful and good. But when you feel trampled on, steamrolled, and ignored as a person, people are being abusive. It’s nothing but ugly selling of the worst order. Compare that to considerate promotion, which is really about helping people get what they’d like. There’s an implicit exchange built in, that’s human, respectful, and affirming.

So what can we do? I wish I fully knew. Refusing to reward bad behavior is a start. You don’t want to encourage such antisocial airplay, where pushy sellers see you as just another scalp on their grubby little belt. Avoid people who won’t treat you with sincerity. Good sellers are comfortable with genuineness and respect. And be prepared to politely but firmly stand for meaning. Just to remind people that behind anonymity we exist as real people who deserve the dignity of valid conversation and good manners.





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