May your life be like a wildflower, growing freely in the beauty and joy of each day.

~ Native American Proverb ~

Love In The Land Of One Night Stands

January 2nd, 2013 ~ Est. reading time: 1 min, 43 secs

Love: is what you need.

Today, young girls are learning to accept that love is scarce but sex is expected. The general trend is to keep having one night stands to prove you are “adequate”.

Drinking to get drunk and having under age sex is now so commonplace, refusing to participate is at best considered quaint and at worst, prudish and pathetic. Sex has become divorced from love.

The spin off from this detachment won’t be fully known for years. But the consequences of cynicism and a lack of intimacy are already all too real, as teens see connection as a using experience.

Quite apart from all the obvious consequences, this drift to a one-night stand mentality is letting go love and surrendering yearnings for intimacy. To be so physically close with someone who you might meet the following week as a “stranger” in the street is a total erosion of closeness.

We need to be loved, appreciated, and respected. It’s at the heart of every great relationship. Which makes it all the more sad that sex has commonly become a drunken fling and uncaring relief. That’s not living and that’s certainly not loving.

Some people believe that sex in a loving relationship represents the pinnacle of love. But I’m not so sure about that. To me, giving to the point where it becomes your joy comes closer to the mark. Whenever giving of your self blurs into getting, love finds its ultimate expression.

But that’s miles away from what teens are learning about life. Love couldn’t be further away, now that one-night stands, lacking respect and intimacy, are holding sway.

I certainly hope that every young person who has stumbled along that road comes to know love when they are ready; both in the giving and receiving. For, without the richness of love in their life they are missing something so fundamental, I believe they will only experience life as a hollow shell.

The bottle is empty and the genie is out. Now, the one-night mindset prevails. But love, and the joy of being in love with someone who wants to stay true to you, sacrifice, adore, and live their life with you will always be what we long for. It’s what living well and sharing your happiness is about. So, no amount of cheap living and settle-for-flings will ever replace it. Love is the good stuff.

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