If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.

~ Dolly Parton ~

Happy People Have Problems Too

March 26th, 2014 ~ Est. reading time: 2 mins, 16 secs

Happy but frazzled

Happy but frazzled

Remarkable as it seems, happy people are beset with troubles too. Their satisfaction isn’t based on their good fortune but on the unique way they view the world.

Yet there is a persistent, widespread belief that being happy means being problem free. Yet how can that be? We all have struggles manifested in relationships, health concerns, and financial challenges (just to name a few).

So it stands to reason people who are more at peace with their life are not dodging all the problem bullets heading their way. Rather, they are interpreting situations differently.

Those never say die super optimists allege that defying difficulties with a can do attitude is all that is required. Heck, they even insist we mustn’t call them problems, just “challenges”.

Their view is that through self-discipline and a positive approach hardships cannot overwhelm us (at least, not for long).

While I see the value in some of that, I would like to point out that being left to rot in a Third World jail would be hard to put a positive spin on. Ditto if your teenager runs away from home, gets into drugs, or forms high-risk relationships.

It certainly would take willpower to see the bright side of your partner subjecting you to domestic violence… And, facing the untimely death of your marriage or the passing of someone close would certainly be a tall order to integrate into a positive context.

Instead, I suggest there are times in life when it is indeed difficult and anything but happy or satisfying. In those times an outpouring of grief makes much more sense (not some “tough it out sermon” and putting on a brave face).

Genuinely happy people face pain, experience it and, ultimately, pass through it. They are not caught up in some multilevel marketing pitch or religion-hyped zealotry. They are merely real. They laugh. But they also cry too.

Ultimately, what happy people do is work through their issues. They reflect on what’s going on in life and find good reasons to act with kindness, marveling at what beauty they can still appreciate.

If you have ever felt there was something wrong with the positive mental attitude version of happiness, all I can say is, “You are right”. You cannot expect to go through this life unscathed. But you and I also have the power to do much good, regardless what situations we find ourselves in.

I believe you deserve happiness if you are willing to bring it to others and think through the things that are happening to you. Although we all want it, most won’t have enough, simply because they’re looking in the wrong places.

That’s why I wrote a book about how to be happy and have a beautiful life in the process. Though it took me years to produce, you can have the benefit of that research in one convenient book that is as much an uplifting read as it is a resource to come back to at any time you like.

Real happiness is not about luck, but a way of understanding the world that uses who you are right now. Interested? Then read it for yourself and discover how some simple but powerful strategies can change everything.

What People Say About Happiness

The Power Of Happy Management

French For Happy 



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