Scallywag

A day without laughter is a day wasted.

~ Charlie Chaplin ~

Handling Sadness

November 26th, 2012 ~ Est. reading time: 1 min, 57 secs

The reality of sadness is only part of the story.

How do you handle sadness? Your answer could also reveal how much happiness you experience too.

For some, any form of disappointment undermines the happiness of a given situation so that everything is ruined. While, for others, sadness is something they can encapsulate. They know it happens and it’s a real feeling. But it’s not the only reality worth keeping.

That sadness something seems more genuine is a curious delusion. Perhaps, it’s driven by the same desire we have to generally want to know the bad news first. By understanding the extent of the loss we feel better able to protect ourselves, and that seems more fundamental to immediate survival than being happy.

But a world that centres on sadness is definitely not a pleasant place. Without the uplifting power of happiness, life switches to mere existence, and none of us want that.

So, if we are aware that sadness needs limits and balance, the next thing is to know how to put it into context. Easy? Hardly. When sadness overwhelm you, it’s difficult to see clearly when you’re crying bitterly.

Depressive illness aside, you can certainly apply strategies to see life more evenly. After all, if times of sadness are justified, so too are time of happiness. In some cases, dwelling in misery can even be “indulgent”. (Take the social martyr who practices emotional self-flagellation to justify how unfair life is for them).

Though we can train ourselves to take a more impartial view, the mind is a fickle thing. That’s why there are plenty of times when it’s wise to seek the advice of a wise friend, family member, or counsellor to put everything into perspective.  They may put an entirely different spin on the cause of our sadness, which can help us work issues through (And who doesn’t need that at least now and then?).

Like all emotions, sadness is a volatile force that’s potentially damaging if not handled well. For this reason, it’s wise to always leave a little chink of space in your thinking that allows for something else. Allowing room for a snippet of possibility lets you turn toward other issues and permits the potential that good still exists. And maybe, just maybe, that you might find it round the next corner.

Undeniably, great tragedies happen and sadness is a common human experience. However, at some point, we need to create or find happiness in situations to help us do well. Dwell too long in the land of shadows and it’s hard to see clearly. But dare to hold up the lamplight of thankfulness and integrity, and gradually happiness comes back into clear relief. Right where it belongs.

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How Can You Be Happy All The Time?

 

 

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