Scallywag

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

~ Oscar Wilde ~

Got Any Funny Sayings And Qoutes?

August 25th, 2012 ~ Est. reading time: 1 min, 51 secs

Funny sayings and qoutes sometimes take some thought (I think).

You’re absolutely right to say funny sayings and qoutes has a typo. But for the sake of getting noticed, I’ll include it. When it comes to Miss Heard Malaproprisms it’s a good fit.

Regular readers know I have a soft spot for word nonsense. So the word play of some funny sayings and qoutes tickles me enough to dig around and share some. Especially ones that, like misheard lyrics, end up being earnestly quoted or just used with no idea what they mean. So, here’s a choice assortment I’ve prepared for you. Some I’ve discovered and the rest are from kids. I hope you like them:

  • I want to be effluent mum!” “You are effluent Kimi…” (meaning affluent) From the Aussie comedy, Kath & Kim
  • “You can plead with me ‘til the cows are blue in the face.”
  • “It’s a choice between two weevils.”
  • “The flood damage was so bad they had to evaporate the city.”
  • “He has terrible poorly” (meaning cerebral palsy).
  • “Any port in the store.”
  • “Get your head out of the clowns.”
  • Damp squid” (meaning damp squib). From the British comedy The IT Crowd
  • “He went away with his head between his tail.”
  • “A bear faced liar.”
  • “He’s barking up the back door.”
  • “Flat out like a lizard drinking.”
  • “Beauty is in the eye of the bolder.”
  • Couldn’t hit his backside on a barn.
  • “Let’s get down to brass roots.”
  •  “Cut to the chaise.”
  • “Don’t bite the ham that feeds you.”
  • “Dad was a kind of civil serpent.”
  • “Fall on your sore.”
  • “A rolling stone gathers no moths.”
  • Exactly what are you incinerating?…”  (meaning insinuating); “Dem polopponies.” (meaning polo ponies) From the British comedy Steptoe and Son.
  • “I’m trying to tie up a loose hole.”
  • “A fete worse than death.”
  • “A man of few errs.”
  • “Kill his heels.”
  • “Add in salt to injury.”
  • “As fat as a pancake.”
  • “Back seat diver.”
  • “Gonna bake the town bread.”
  • “In court with your pens down.”
  • “Chip off the old shoulder.”
  • “Forbidden flute.”
  • “Hard road to hoe.”
  • “He’s got a stomach made of lead.”
  • A time for liver is a time to die.
  • “A washed pot never boils.”
  • “As tough as snails.”
  • “He who levitates is lost.”

So after that motley assortment, I wonder if you found any to relish? Perhaps you might have a few funny sayings and qoutes of your own too that need dusting off. If so, I’d like to hear from you. After all, if you play with sparks, you’ve got matches. Or, more pointedly, “A little lozenge is a dangerous thing”, and that’s all I’ve got to say ‘bout that…

 

Feegs

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