Scallywag

I sometimes wonder whether all pleasures are not substitutes for joy.

~ C S Lewis ~

Drop Your Guard

March 17th, 2014 ~ Est. reading time: 1 min, 26 secs

When we are our genuine self there's no need to compete.

When we are our genuine self there’s no need to compete.

People compete. At all sorts of levels, you will find folk trying to outdo you, undercut you, impress, and distress. It seems life teems with competition.

Take that woman you recently spotted. If you are also a woman, chances are you gave her the quick look down and up to size her up and decided whether she was “better than you” or not. It might have been much more subtle than that, but the mindset is there.

Likewise, if you are a man, you may well have noticed how other men try to impress and outdo you with their car, clothes, position, strength, or dominance.

Across the genders there is still a sense of “Is this person above, beneath, or at my level?” “Are they better looking?” “Do they have more money than me?” “Are they smarter?” and so on.

Let me suggest something radical. Give up. That’s right, stop competing and drop your guard completely.

When you aren’t in the hunt to impress anyone, life feels freer. They might be ten times better off than you. So what?  True, “She” looks better than you do. Yet that’s entirely fine. We are all different so you don’t need to compete.

When you put the butter knife down and take the threat level down from jumping up and down, stamping on the ground, the improvement is immediate. With practice, mixing with people becomes a markedly more relaxed experience. At least, that’s the theory.

You will still meet combative types who won’t accept you really don’t want to play the “who’s better than who” game. Plus, you’ll keep meeting plenty of people too uptight to engage in a relaxed way anyway. But that’s okay.

The more you unwind about not being the beautiful, the handsome, the smarter, or whatever, the less it matters (which happens to be the truth). Because, in the grand scheme of life, it really doesn’t matter at all.

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