Scallywag

Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget about it.

~ Jacques Prevert ~

Dedicating a Birthday Poem To A Father Who Has Passed Away

January 23rd, 2013 ~ Est. reading time: 2 mins, 26 secs

It’s not your skills that do justice in honoring a loved one, but your care.

If you need to produce a birthday poem to a father who has passed on, it’s possible you will be having a mental block about the process (that’s why you are looking here). Yet, fear not. Though it takes a bit more effort, I firmly believe you’ll do better writing something straight from you rather than lifting the comments of others off the Internet.

Why? Well copying a birthday poem to a father (maybe your father) who has passed away is about as sincere as paying somebody else to say your wedding vows. Better to risk saying something clunky but genuine than slick and insincere.

That’s why I’ve put together some tips to help you. If you want to convey how you feel then use fewer words, not more. Oh, and keep them simple. Plain words say more than a string of fancy ones when you’re choked with emotion (plus they’re easier to say). Which, of course implies that any birthday poem to a beloved father who has passed on deserves to be read aloud. Or, better still, said from memory.

Before you get overwrought by performance pressure, let’s start with a list. Write down everything about the man that comes to mind. Censor nothing and write down everything. This will provide you with a pool of words to help build your poem.

Then, make another list. This time, jot down memories of Dad that come to mind with the benefit off reflection. Just keep them brief. Then add the best to your birthday poem mix. Remember, writing a birthday poem to a father who has passed away doesn’t mean you have to be a Poet Laureate. Just someone who feels strongly about their father (or someone else’s) and who wants to remember them on their birthday.

To that end, the material you have already collected will make it far easier. You can even, if you want, read out your descriptive word list, punctuating each with silence to create poetic form. Alternatively, you can string some of those personal impressions you wrote to form a series of mental pictures. Making up a birthday poem to a father who has passed away might not be the easiest thing you’ve done. But it doesn’t have to be too hard. Just sincere.

People who care won’t judge you if you write something that’s not technically correct. They will simply appreciate the care you put into bothering to write and read a poem about him in the first place.

Lastly, aim to be brief. There’s no need to say much more than what could be said in a minute or three. Being short and sweet, you convey a sense of your love and affection for your father, whilst leaving room for others to fill in the gaps with their own impressions. Good poetry lets you do that.

Just remember: if you’ve been asked to produce a birthday poem to a father who has passed on, you will own the experience more if you do it yourself. Taking someone else’s words – no matter how eloquent – permanently keeps you that little bit distant, and that surely can’t be good. Good words when spoken aloud, aren’t always the most polished or articulate (far from it). What marks great words is feeling. So, trust yourself and express remembrance by speaking humbly from your heart.

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