Scallywag

Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length.

~ Robert Frost ~

About Coping

December 5th, 2013 ~ Est. reading time: 1 min, 56 secs

Not managing very well today.

Not managing very well today.

How do you cope? It’s a question that depends on a whole lot of variables and the answer changes without notice.

Coping with the pressures and problems of daily life is partly about events, and totally about perception. If you are feeling frazzled and just want to flop down onto a corner couch, chances are it won’t take much to tip you over the edge.

Then again, when you have your energy levels up and a clear head, it seems like everything is doable. At those times, you feel like you could eat three headed challenges for breakfast and still have the vigor to overcome someone else’s.

Some people are particularly clever at making themselves look like their  capacity to handle life never changes. But that is, of course, an illusion.

When famous celebrities have awkward moments exposed before a scrambling media, we suddenly see that – like us – they’re human too and sometimes they don’t cope at all.

When the British celebrity chef, Nigella Lawson, admitted under oath that she had used cocaine and marijuana, it showed that far from being made of Teflon, she too made bad decisions as she felt her life falling apart.

You know all too well that your coping levels are not constant. Yet, we live in a world where it is generally ignored or openly disapproved of. The extent that you can present an image of never fluctuating in your ability to manage determines your degree of public respect.

For instance, your employer won’t appreciate that you don’t cope too well on Mondays. Nor do they want to know that you are feeling fragile at the moment. Because whenever your frailties encroach on their expectations, the outcome is never going to be pretty.

In Australia, support agencies for people with depression are encouraging sufferers to speak out and tell their boss what is going on. Trouble is, people instinctively know that’s not going to go down well. So people are inclined to hide their difficulties, only revealing them with folk they can  feel safe with.

That’s understandable. But a more realistic view of our social interaction has to factor in that all of us have fluctuating levels of coping. Then maybe, we will get to that point where we can all be honest about our vulnerabilities without losing face.

In the meantime, it’s good to be open to others so that they can be more real in your presence. Letting people safely show their susceptibilities builds trust, strengthens a sense of mutual support, and reinforces belonging.

So even if the public at large won’t do it, we can. Because supporting each other when we feel less than our best makes us all stronger.

Return To Work And Cancer

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Demotivators At Work

Feegs

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