Scallywag

Self-knowledge is the beginning of self-improvement.

~ Spanish Proverb ~

33 More Funny Happy Birthday Quotes

February 17th, 2013 ~ Est. reading time: 2 mins, 48 secs

Funny Happy Birthday quotes? Really?

Okay, I know people want more funny happy birthday quotes. So I have scrounged and scraped, trawled and sifted to find you even more. Enjoy!

  1. Age is a number and mine is unlisted.”  Author Unknown
  2. “If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.”  Ubie Blake
  3. As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.”  Sir Norman Wisdom
  4. “Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.”  Jennifer Yan
  5. Very few people do anything creative after the age of thirty-five. The reason is that very few people do anything creative before the age of thirty-five.”  Joel Hildebrand
  6. The lovely thing about being forty is that you can appreciate twenty-five-year-old men.”   Colleen McCullough
  7. “They tell you that you’ll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don’t tell you is that you won’t miss it very much.”  Malcolm Cowley
  8. When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.”   Author Unknown
  9. “Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.”  Bob Hope
  10. Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.”  George Burns
  11. First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down.”  Leo Rosenber
  12. Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.”  Chili Davis
  13. “If you survive long enough, you’re revered – rather like an old building.”  Katherine Hepburn
  14. The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.”  Lucille Ball
  15. Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.”  Billie Burke
  16. “The more I live, the more I think that humor is the saving sense.”  Jacob August Riis
  17. They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body.”  Author Unknown
  18. The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.”  Jerry M. Wright
  19. “Looking fifty is great… if you’re sixty.”  Joan Rivers
  20. When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished a how much he had learned in seven years.”  Mark Twain
  21. We know we’re getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.”  Author Unknown
  22. The best substitute for experience is being sixteen.”  Raymond Duncan
  23. “Finally 21, and legally able to do everything I’ve been doing since 15.”  Author Unknown
  24. When you turn 30, a whole new thing happens: you see yourself acting like you parents.”  Blair Sabol
  25. Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.”  Caryn Leschen
  26. “Why is a birthday cake the only food you can blow on and spit on and everybody rushes to get a piece?”  Bobby Kelton
  27. I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn’t have one. So I got a cake.”   Mitch Hedberg
  28. “Gray hair is God’s graffiti.”   Bill Cosby
  29. The first hundred years are the hardest.”  Wilson Mizner
  30. “I’ve told so many lies about my age I don’t know how old I am myself.”  Ruby Wax
  31. Middle age is when you still believe you’ll feel better in the morning.”  Bob Hope
  32. Thirty five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty-five for years.”  Oscar Wilde
  33. “Some people reach the age of sixty before others.”  Lord Hood

If these 33 funny birthday quotes aren’t enough, have a gander at what I’ve already posted. But, if they are still don’t do the trick, keep looking wider across the Web.

Funny happy birthday quotes can be found in lots of places and, with a bit of persistence, you might find precisely what you’re looking for. Good luck and happy looking! fff

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